I Got Whacked!

Sometimes you get hit out of nowhere. It's like an ambush and you walk straight into it. One moment you are on your feet. Next thing you know you are lying there, bleeding and without the faintest idea of what hit you.

Ok, that was an exaggeration but I could identify with the bewilderment caused by such an unexpected and uncalled for attack.

This morning Hubby alerted me to a comment on one of his Facebook posts.

See the last comment? It's from someone who visited our cell a few times and disappeared after that.

To set the record straight, I don't recall ever meeting her on the street. And I am ashamed to admit that I wouldn't know it's her even if she were to greet me.

That would be more embarrassing for me and it would certainly upset her even more. And If that had been the scenario, I would most probably be labelled with far more derogatory adjectives.

Anyway, I am just curious. Her gripe is with me not greeting her, but why didn't she greet me instead? What's the big deal?

Whether you are recognised and greeted by someone or you recognise and greet someone: is there a difference? Could it be that the former gives one a sense of superiority?

That, I think, is something important for someone who values humility to think about.

Meat Or Poison?

I encountered a situation last Sunday that perfectly illustrates the saying one man's meat, another man's poison.

Both KT and Hubby were not well last Sunday. Lillian and I had to buy dinner for them. One asked for porridge while the other demanded for nasi kandar to speed up his recovery.

That's how different people can be.

No Escape

They are everywhere. On Thursday night we were having dinner at the Mt Erskine night market and within that short half-an-hour we had to move from one table to another twice just to get away from them.

If you still don't know what I'm talking about, I am referring to smokers. One of the most, if not the most, selfish people on planet earth.

Sometimes I just wish I could just do that

And if you would think that we could have avoided them when we are home, you're wrong. Our neighbour in the next apartment smokes the foulest smelling cigarette ever and she, yes it's a woman, would have her nightly smoke out on the balcony.

Unfortunately we are down wind and so we are the unwilling recipients of all her second-hand smoke. We have no choice but to close our door and windows. It's either we deprive ourselves of the cooling night breezes or die from the effects of second-hand smoke.

If we can complain to the authorities on noise pollution, can we also lodge a complain tabout air pollution?

Lessons Learned From 2012

1. Don't be too quick to offer unsolicited advice or opinion. It is seldom well received and very often you are perceived to be a busy body. I will no longer suffer the indignity of having my helpfulness thrown back at my face, so I'm learning the art of "buat bodoh lebih selamat" (act stupid more safe) since "guna akai kena sakai" (use brain get clobbered). When they ask, then shall it be given.


2. When it comes to reminding anyone of anything, once is enough. Twice is still acceptable, because the person may not have heard you the first time, but thrice or more makes you a nag. I don't want to be a nag so I'm not going to repeat myself like a broken record, except with people who appreciate my good intentions. Take it or leave it.


3. Don't live your life around other people's schedule or non-schedule. There is so much of living to do and so little time left for me to do it that I'm no longer going to sit around waiting for life to happen to me. Carpe diem.


4. Enjoy your friends, the people who like you for who you are and not for what you have or have not done; the people who share your laughter and your tears and walk with you through all your fears; gracious people who choose to see the best in you and wish the best for you; people who enrich and energise you. This year I'm only going to venture where I'm wanted and really put time and effort into nurturing those mutually caring relationships that put a song in my heart. Let's sing harmony!

I'm A Santarina!

It was Christmas Eve. Due to an emergency I became a replacement Santarina!

Realising that I am no Santa Claus, and Hubby is on the mainland for the day, I called on Baby Sis to help me deliver...nasi kunyit.

Yes, this Santarina's assignment was to deliver nasi kunyit for her grandson's Full Moon. What a privilege!

Baby Sis canceled her 3pm appointment in order to ferry me around. She said that it's an honour to be called on at the last minute because that shows how comfortable and at ease I am with her. Isn't she an angel?

With Baby Sis at the wheel battling the Christmas Eve traffic, I was able to phone the recipients to check whether they are home while we are on the way from one place to another. That was a real help because I cannot imagine driving and calling and parking the car and sending the gifts all by myself.

We didn't have time for lunch because we were in a rush to deliver the nasi kunyit before the curry turns bad. Then God sent another angel to our rescue.

Priscilla called to ask whether we had eaten. She said she was cooking spaghetti and invited us over for a meal. Where can you find such kind and loving people like that? I am truly blessed to have these two angels in my life.

Santarina crossing the road with the remaining boxes of nasi kunyit. We couldn't leave them in the car while we have lunch.

At the end of our delivery route both of us were worn out. Believe me! Santa Claus cannot be real because there is no way a person can deliver presents all over the world within the space of a few hours.

I went back to office with a headache and had to go back and rest before dinner. But it's all worth it because...

I love you Caden Kan JiaZhi.

Blessed Full Moon!

Shocked

This morning Poh Lin attended service at TOP. After the service she came to us and said that she had a shock when she heard me being introduced as the speaker.

She said I was funny. I suppose giving people a good laugh is preferable to making them cry.

The last time she came to TOP, she also got a shock when she saw Hubby playing the guitar as part of the worship team.

She told us that she didn't know that we are such a "talented" family. And she is impressed.

So the Lord sprang two shocking surprises on her last two visits to TOP. Hmmm, I wonder what God has in store for her next.

An Honest Man

A few days ago I went to the Cheah Yew Shop in Jalan Fettes to buy lunch. After packing my lunch the young man told me that it costs RM4.50. So I grabbed some ringgit notes from my wallet and passed them to him. He took the money and said, "Auntie, why are you giving me so much money?"

I thought I had given him a ringgit or two more but the note he returned me was a RM50 note! In my hurry, I did not realise that there was a RM50 note wedged among the blue ringgit notes.

"Thank you," I said,  "And God bless you, you are an honest man."

Honest people like this young man ought to be commended and he makes me believe there are still a lot of good people out there despite some of the horrors we read in  the newspapers.

Sacrificial Giving

There's charity and there's charity.

Take for example, our annual cell project to raise funds for the Eden Handicapped Centre. All the cell members would chip in some money to order food which some of us will sell at the food and fun fair. All proceeds from the sale are then donated to the centre.

The only sacrifice on our part was the small sum each of us invested which was used to generate funds for the home. Technically there is hardly any sacrifice at all. There are so many of us sharing that our individual investment becomes minimal. The ones who sacrificed anything at all are those who gave of their time to man the stall and sell the products.

There is also another kind of fund-raising where we would pay to attend a high-end gala dinner or watch the premiere of a block-buster or participate in some sporting event in aid of some charitable organisation. To be frank, I find it difficult to associate any altruistic motives with our participation in such events. Normally the glamour, prestige, enjoyment and fun we get out of such events more than make up for whatever sum we have to fork out to participate in them. In the case of sporting events, the many freebies – T-shirts, caps, etc – that participants get in their goodie bags nullify any claim of contributing to charity.

Having said all that, I thank God that there are pro-active and benevolent people who are willing to give time, effort and money to organise and participate in fund-raising events in order to raise public awareness of the needs in our society and to help the underprivileged. Please do continue to contribute in whichever way you can, regardless of whatever your motives may be, because every effort, no matter how small, can change lives.

However, in my most humble opinion, and without any intention of belittling anyone's endeavour, the most meaningful kind of fund-raising comes with a cost. This leads me to the objective of this post, which is to introduce you to one brave lady.

She is Suan Bee, the wedding planner for my 'bee's wedding. On 26th August 2012 she went bald for a worthy cause and raised RM16, 800 for the Adventist Hospital Cancer Fund. My respect for her does not stem from the money she raised but that she gave out of a great conviction and, as a woman, I believe it was done at great cost to herself. And the sacrifice is not just for a day but will be over a few months until her hair grows back.

I salute you Suan Bee!

Look at what she had to say about her decision to go bald. This is taken from her Facebook timeline dated 26th August 2012:

When i made the decision to go bald, a lot of my friends asked what made me decide to go bald. Everyone said that i am very courageous to go bald especially when i'm a lady. And i'm very grateful for all the support and contribution that flowed in from the time i posted on my FB.

However, i would like to say that this is not about me :-) It is about all the cancer patients and survivors out there who are fighting or have fight the battle. We would like to convey to them that there's always hope and miracles do happen...Do not be afraid of how you look as beauty is from within... The divine, guides and angels will always be there to protect and love you...:-) 

Simply awesome!

CNY First Day at Work

There were only four of us at the Front Office when office reopened after the Chinese New Year break. There were also very few phone calls to attend to. So what do we do? The unanimous decision was to camwhore!

Maui 4-8 October 2011

Opening Lunch for sessions 911 (mine) and 912 was held on Tuesday.

 The 4 Malaysians (L to R): Nancy, Boey, Jean and I

Soyolmaa from Mongolia, Herda, Mercy and Roma 

from Indonesia and Munguu from Mongolia

Mantinti from Zimbabwe is our Resident Coordinator. 

Beside her is Anna and Junisas from Indonesia 

and Bongi from South Africa.

Sal from Philippines said I look like her daughter-in-law!

Table-setting and the delicious meal during the Opening Lunch

 On Saturday classes ended at 5pm so we had time 

to walk to the beach

 Posing beside a Maui Police car

 Caitlin, one of the volunteers, taught us how to make gift boxes

Cat People

Some people are like cats. They always land on their feet.

They are never stumped, even when asked questions which they don't have the answers to. Somehow they are always able to come up with a convincing and "correct", albeit unconventional answer.

The Nightmare Before, During and After Christmas

Friday, 17 December 2010
Sarah, our Indonesian maid of more than three years, told Lillian that she has been hearing voices asking her to follow them.

Sunday, 19 December 2010
She was so tired and worn out from lack of sleep that she slept the whole day.

Monday, 20 December 2010
She was still listless and lethargic so we let her rest another day.

Tuesday, 21 December 2010
When Lillian was ready to send her over to our apartment she found the maid in bed wrapped up in blanket. She refused to budge when called so Lillian left for her appointment.

When I went over to pick her she did not answer or open the gate for me even though I rang the bell, called the house phone and even called her handphone.

Yes, we trusted her so much and she had been such a good maid
that we bought her a handphone when she requested for one
so that she could call home.

Later in the day when hubby and I went over to confront her she said she didn't hear the doorbell or the phones ringing. She acknowledged that she was not well and consented to being prayed for.

Wednesday, 22 December 2010
I took Pastor Wai Fong and two other cell members over and we prayed for her. She confessed that she has a boyfriend who fell sick the week before and on Tuesday, 14 December 2010, she "kongsi kekuatan" with him. She also confessed that she had stolen money from Lillian.

Thursday, 23 December 2010
She started to openly engage the voices in conversation and was so spaced out that she could not complete simple tasks that she used to do. Even the manner in which she talked changed. It was as if she was some politician giving a ceramah.

She also refused to eat and bathe!

Friday, 24 December 2010
We asked the agent to talk to her and to inform her that we have no choice but to send her back.

Saturday, 25 December 2010
Lillian took her for breakfast at Gurney Tower, left her to speak to someone and when she came back the maid was gone. According to the cook at the mamak store she walked off.

So we made a police report.

Sunday, 26 December 2010
She came back in the next day! She claimed that she did not know what happened to her the past 24 hours or more. She walked back to our apartment when she finally came to her senses.

A friend who supplies foreign workers to the factories kindly offered to house her for the night while we tried to arrange to send her back. At the hostel she exhibited such freakish behaviour that it scared the occupants of the apartment. Spending the night, packed like sardines, with their friends in the other apartments was preferable to spending the night under the same roof with her.

Monday, 27 December 2010
The agent advised us to get a doctor to certify that she is fit to travel before sending her home. So we took her for a check up at the Perak Road clinic. After a blood test and consultation they diagnosed her with schizophrenia.

We took her home, took away the house keys, kept all the knives in our bedroom and slept behind locked doors. We could not risk another "runaway" episode so we had to keep her under constant surveillance.

Tuesday, 28 December 2010
The medication proved to be too strong for her. The next morning she was curled up on the floor, complaining that she could not open her eyes. She could not walk at all. She was like a blind drunk, staggering around with her eyes closed and hands outstretched!

We went back to the Perak Road clinic where we were given a referral for admission at Casualty and Emergency at the General Hospital. However, the wait was so long that by the time the MO saw her the medication had worn off. She was back to "normal" — like she was before taking the medicine — albeit still talking to herself. Thus it was not necessary to admit her but they did another blood test and ordered a brain scan.

Thank God the Dancing Doctor — a senior member of the trauma team — who was on leave happened to drop by the hospital and saw me. He told the yong MO that a brain scan was unnecessary and that saved me a few hundred ringgit.

Actually the Dancing Doctor sms-ed to tell me to immediately go
to ER, tell them I know him and to start dropping his name
in order to get things done faster. But the dropping his name part
sounded so ludicrous and I was stressed out accompanying the maid
to the hospital while at the same timetrying to work on my laptop
that I thought I had dreamt it all. It was only later
that I retrieved the sms and realized
that it wasn't a dream.

We finally obtained a referral to the Psychiatric Ward for the next day but it was too late so we went home.

Wednesday, 29 December 2010
I took her to the Psychiatric ward early in the morning. At first they said we had to make an appointment but I insisted on seeing someone that day because we were supposed to have seen the psychiatrist the day before if not for the late hour. We finally managed to see the psychiatrist but she still could not give us a letter certifying that Sarah was fit to travel.

So I took Sarah back and that was the start of the longest two weeks of my life. I had to make sure she take her medication and we had to take her with us everywhere we went. In short I became nurse, baby-sitter and jailer to my maid.

Thursday, 13 January 2011
The day of the check up finally dawned. We saw another doctor who told me that I have to get a medical report and accompany my maid back! Of course I objected and said that if that were the case I would have taken her back earlier and saved myself the inconvenience of the past two weeks. After consulting with his superior, he issued a memo stating that Sarah is healthy and stable and therefore fit to travel.

Monday, 17 January 2011
We dropped her off at the agent's office for her flight home the next morning. Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! What joy! The nightmare is finally over. I survived.

The reason for this post: That I may not forget the chronology of events
although I'll never want to live through it again.

And my New Year resolution: NO MORE MAIDS.

So Touched

The bride called me to check whether I could find the hotel where her dinner was held.

This is simply amazing 'cos it's a wedding with at least 60 tables and I didn't think I was anyone special to her.

I Also Want

I don't need it but if it's free then I must have it!

So kiasu.

The Velveteen Rabbit

Children's stories sometimes speak to adults at a deeper level, very much like the parables of Jesus.

That comic strip reminded me of the wealth of truth found in the children's classic "The Velveteen Rabbit" by Margery Williams.

The story begins like this:

"There was once a velveteen rabbit, and in the beginning he was really splendid. He was fat and bunchy, as a rabbit should be; his coat was spotted brown and white, he had real thread whiskers, and his ears were lined with pink sateen. On Christmas morning, when he sat wedged in the top of the Boy's stocking, with a spring of holly between his paws, the effect was charming.

The boy loved the rabbit for at least two hours, before relegating him to the toy cupboard where he was snubbed by the more expensive and mechanical toys, the latter of which thought that they were real.

Then one day he found out a secret while talking to the Skin Horse.

"The Skin Horse had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so old that his brown coat was bald in patches and showed the seams underneath, and most of the hairs in his tail had been pulled out to string bead necklaces. He was wise, for he had seen a long succession of mechanical toys arrive to boast and swagger, and by-and-by break their mainsprings and pass away, and he knew that they were only toys, and would never turn into anything else...

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become real. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

We live in a world of phonies and we are all phonies to some degree. One of the blessings of life is becoming real and knowing that people actually like the real you.

But we can only drop our masks and become realies with people who love us, accept us for what we are - uglies and all - and yet, care enough to nurture us to be all the best that we can be.

The latter part is very important because there is no point being a real but horrible person. We should aspire to be real and good.

That is why becoming real and good takes time and once it happens it doesn't matter what other people think of you.

When we come to God we are assured of His love, nurturance and patience with us. That's why we can all be like the Velveteen Rabbit who eventually became real. It takes time but God makes all things, including you and me, beautiful in His time and in His sight.

Let us let God do His work in us so we have more realies around.

Click here to read the rest of this delightful tale. Enjoy!

People Follow People

Have you noticed how a popular food stall will draw a bigger crowd than one that is not so popular? It doesn't matter whether the food is better or not. As long as we see more people patronising the stall we assume that the food is better.

Take today for example.

This morning we were having breakfast when the otak-otak seller came around to sell her wares. None of the customers in the coffee-shop bought from her. They either rebuffed or ignored her.

When she came to our table, I bought two packets of otak-otak as a treat for my maid who likes her otak-otak. Mana tau, after that the people sitting at the tables around us started purchasing from her.

2 packets of otak-otak that started the buying frenzy

So if you are in business and you want to create demand, just plant some "customers" to show you have a following and people who follow people will flock to your stall, which will in turn draw a bigger crowd.

That's the power of suggestion.