Saturday, August 30, 2008

Farewell Josh

Josh flanked by his mom and younger sis

It seemed as if it was only yesterday that we attended a farewell party for Josh at Rasa Sayang's Ferringhi Grill. After that the days sped by in a blur and, before we knew it, we were at the airport bawling our hearts out as we sent him off to Jackson, Tennessee this morning.
I really empathized with Lillian as I relived again the pain of my traumatic separation from Pam when she left to study in KL.

We were all so emotional that we forgot to pray for Josh before he left! Can you imagine that? Anyway, when I prayed for him in that morning, I was assured that the presence of the Lord had gone before him to prepare the way for him.

A parent's consolation is that after we've given our all and done our best, we should and could trust our children to make the right choices when we are not around. Above all else, our greatest comfort lies in knowing that God is with them and He definitely does a better job at caring for our children than we could ever do.

But that is easier said than done. We are, after all, emotional beings and, especially for mothers, it is akin to cutting off a piece of our heart when our children leave the nest. So Josh, we'll all miss you but remember, the one who misses you most will be your mom.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Girls' Weekend in KL

Birthday party no. 2 was held in KL on the weekend following my birthday bash in Penang. Celebrated with babee and Lillian, my best girl-friends. Only us girls.

'Bee and me

Lillian and I

We went to the Pavilion and had lunch at Michelangelo. Lovely place, good food, great company.

Note the M on the chairs? We prefer to think it refers to 'Melinda' hence the effort to include it in the photos.

Time Flies

It certainly does. I was doing so well with regualr posts until 6 August and then all posts vanished. Sigh. Already not getting enough sleep where to find the time to blog?

I surrender.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Pillow Ears

Do pillows have ears?
Yes, they do.

And what are the ears for?
To tickle someone under the nose just as they are falling asleep or to wake them from slumber.

Soft and ticklish pillow ears


The original plan was to hold my birthday at Opera. We even went through the trouble of getting the number of orders for each choice of main course but had to cancel at the last minute due to the increase in number of guests. That place being small could not accommodate us because they were catering for a wedding party on the same night. So we moved back to 32 The Mansion and had no regrets because everyone enjoyed the food and the ambience.

The courtyard at 32 The Mansion

Listening to Mel and Ynn simulating a conversation in Thai was hilarious and Shawn had the time of his life being the object of so much female attention.

Shawn, the thorn, enjoying the attention of the Ken Ray roses

The highlight of the night was the cutting of the birthday cake. I only blew out the candles because there was no cake for me to cut. Lillian made me the loveliest cupcakes for my birthday cake. Each cupcake was individually decorated and the girls ended up fighting for their favourite ones.

My colourful birthday cupcake tower

I am blessed to be surrounded by my staff and of course, my sister and family. The only one missing was my babee. How I wish she was there but, if it's any consolation, I'll be celebrating with her this weekend.

Winning & Losing

Sometimes you lose when you win 'cos winning is not everything.

Monday, August 4, 2008

A Carrot, an Egg and a Cup of Coffee

Here's a folklore tale of wisdom from Joke du Jour that I'm recording on the blog for future reference.

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.

Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what you see."

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg.

Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?"

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength? Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way...the brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

Crazy or not?

We went for the most expensive movie ever when we were in KL two weekends ago. Paid RM40 EACH to watch "Dark Knight" at the Platinum Movie Suite, Cineleisure. Crazy or not?

Apparently there are quite a number of crazy people around. Once is enough for me.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Relationships to the T

There are many types of relationships and I have basically put them in five categories. Since I'm a save-the-best-for-the-last kind of person I'll start with the one that is at the bottom of the list.


It is a tragedy in life to be in a toxic relationship where there is abuse whether physical, emotional, mental or verbal. The strange thing about those in an abusive relationship is the inability of the victim to remove herself or himself from the abusive partner because of the co-dependent nature of the relationship.

I know of one girl who was bashed up by her boyfriend. Both families, hers and his, as well as friends advised her to break off relationship with the good-for-nothing guy. She didn't and went on to marry him instead. Now she is divorced because the bashing continued during the marriage.

There's another kind of toxic relationship where there is no end in sight. The most frequent scenario for this kind of relationship is where one party is married or unwilling to get married and the victim keeps on hoping while the other party has his/her cake and eat it.

A toxic relationship is tortuous when one is in it and traumatic when one tries to break free but one must break free in order to live.


There is no peace in a troubled relationship which is very tiring to maintain one. Fights and quarrels are the frequent with one or both parties taking more than giving, keeping scores and generally being more concerned for the unholy trinity of I, Me and Myself than the partner.

There is hope for this relationship if the party or parties are willing to resolve the problem issues in their relationship.


Some couples progress from a troubled relationship to a tolerable relationship. Fighting is too taxing and since it is tedious to start the whole looking-for-the-right-partner routine they simply settle for keeping the peace and not rocking the boat. It's nothing to shout about but at least they are not shouting at each other.

This is settling for second best and ultimately brings resentment, especially if one partner is actively keeping the peace while the other continues with his or her unrepentent ways.


There is excitement and contentment in this relationship. If it sounds oxymoronic that's because some of the best things in life are two opposing truths held in tension. There is growth and progress because each partner brings out and nurtures the best in the other.


This relationship has withstood the test of time. It reminds me of the story of an old man who visited his wife at the nursing home every day. She has Alzheimer's so does not know him most of the time. When asked why he kept up the practice he replied, "She doesn't know me, but I know her." That is true love.