Monday, May 19, 2008

Words Women Use


The person who came up with this must either be a woman
who wants to educate men on the fine art of understanding 'woman talk'
or a guy who has learned it the hard way.

I think it is the latter.

1) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are
right and you need to shut up.

2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour.
If you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house, it means two seconds.

3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something,
and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "Nothing" usually end in "Fine."

4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!


5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement
often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about "Nothing" (see #3).

6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman
can make to a man. "That's okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you. Do not question, make sarcastic
remarks or faint. Just say you're welcome.

8) Whatever: A woman's way of saying "Drop dead!"


9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement,
meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?". See #3.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Mother's Day Special

There are reasons why certain days are better than others.

Here's one.


Thanks, 'bee, for making it home this Mother's Day.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Lesson Well Learned

Remember my tantrum a few days ago?

Here's the souvenir to remind me of the folly of stubbornness and not knowing when to let go.



Lesson well learned.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

My Man Is The Best

Last night I threw a tantrum because I could not find the speakers for my com. After a rampage through the cupboards I drew blood when the corner of a box file cut me down the front of my shin. Finally found out that I had given the speakers to my daughter. So forgetful and all the madness for nothing.

I'm ashamed for all that childishness but the point of this post is to sing the praise of my man. He is so sweet. Today he bought me new speakers so I won't be "mung chung." He's one in a million and I love him so very much.

That reminded me of a time long ago when he asked me to hold his brand new portable CD player while he was attending to something else and
I dropped it! I don't know how it happened but it just slipped out of my hand.

This was back in those days when CDs first came on the scene so it was expensive and high end techie stuff. Any other husband would have had a fit but my man just said, "I should not have passed it to you." I am well known for being klutzy, especially around electronic stuff, but can you believe it, he took the blame when it was my fault.

My darling, you're the best!

Monday, May 5, 2008

Thanks 'bee!

Why?

Because you made me a mom!

No Mommy's Song

They write and sing such beauiful songs, songs like "Butterfly Kisses" and "Cinderella," for daughters on their wedding day. But do you notice something, they are always from the daddy's perspective. Why no mommy's song?

You know why? That's because mom is too busy bawling her eyes out at her daughter's wedding to be able to sing!

A mom is a bundle of conflicting emotions at her daughter's wedding. She is happy that her baby has found someone special. At the same time she is sad because she is giving her baby away.

Yup, daddies give their daughters away at weddings but it's the mommies who feel the pain.

A thousand and one questions are running through her mind. Can he be trusted to make her happy? Could he deliver on the promises he is making? Will he cherish and love her for the rest of their lives? Am I losing a daughter or gaining a son?

Imagine the stress, want to cry and want to laugh and all the while have to keep on smiling. If summore have to sing, sure choke to death wan. That's why no mommy's song.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Serenity Prayer

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can;

and wisdom to know the difference.


Although known most widely in its abbreviated form above, the entire prayer reads as follows:

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;

Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;

Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

This is one of my all-time favourite prayers and especially suited for times like the past week when serenity is elusive in the midst of the madness of juggling too many things at the same time. Pure energy-sapping, mind-numbing, stress-inducing insanity.

I am too old to be doing this. No wonder people retire at 50.